tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8882574271400724009.post5886472398129749257..comments2023-09-29T14:08:28.531+01:00Comments on Mad Aunt Bernards Tortoise Poetry: Letter from Aunt Bench About Folly's...well..MoodsMad Aunt Bernardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16916242560785536017noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8882574271400724009.post-89196110298419879672009-05-21T21:34:56.447+01:002009-05-21T21:34:56.447+01:00Hen - it didn't work, she saw me hiding behind an ...Hen - it didn't work, she saw me hiding behind an open window. Bugger.<br />Feck - remember a boot in the hole is worth two in the bush....or something like that.<br />Ah, Poetikat. The pine needles have been reducing rapidly, perhaps that is the answer(the woodlice are safe as we have a ban on them until 2012).<br />Weevil, beware of Vom, she's on the warpath claiming you've left a 'calling card' in the umbrella stand again.<br />And thankyou Will - I will indeed invest in one - nice for when the children visit, and like you say, because I am worth it!Mad Aunt Bernardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16916242560785536017noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8882574271400724009.post-47765661620262281672009-05-20T23:01:01.854+01:002009-05-20T23:01:01.854+01:00Might I recommend a product from lemmybee.com, a n...Might I recommend a product from lemmybee.com, a napalm dispenser hand crafted to fit the inside of your letterbox for the delight of anybody occupying your doorstep? Because you're worth it.Willhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13625335820965303770noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8882574271400724009.post-37474905795628282032009-05-20T21:54:53.475+01:002009-05-20T21:54:53.475+01:00Dearest Bern,
Having read Bench's letter of the 2...Dearest Bern,<br /><br />Having read Bench's letter of the 20th inst. I am appalled - that creature really is the giddy limit.<br /><br />For her to purport that I suggested she should 'get away' is a total fabrication. In fact, and bugger my socks if I didn't, I told her to "F*** O**". <br /><br />At this, she cried that she would report my insolence to Vom. However, after her little trepanning display in the childrens' maximum security wing, methinks she is hardly likely to receive a warm welcome there again.<br /><br />Stand firm, girl!!<br /><br />Your loving sister,<br /><br />Weevil.<br /><br /><br />PS. Do you still have that little trick for removing blood and faeces from lace curtains? It local election time here again, but in spite of all my warning signs, they DO still come in!The Lesser Weevilhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08936694594717599122noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8882574271400724009.post-31316286943696542642009-05-20T16:19:39.573+01:002009-05-20T16:19:39.573+01:00"I should be with you in ten minutes." Ha ha ha. ..."I should be with you in ten minutes." Ha ha ha. Are you sure she hasn't been hiding in the woodshed living off woodlice and pine needles for the duration? I don't think she was ever looking for your approval. By the time she goes back home (if ever), some interloper will have probably chewed up your response. I suggest smoke signals using Aunt Weevil's crochety, er crocheted afghan (the dog, NOT the blanket).<br /><br />Best of luck!<br /><br />Kat<br /><br />(TWO can play THIS game!)Kat Mortensenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16877694888419628533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8882574271400724009.post-60556851411114617832009-05-20T15:52:41.717+01:002009-05-20T15:52:41.717+01:00I sympathise entirely MAB, but as bad as relatives...I sympathise entirely MAB, but as bad as relatives are though ,neighbours are even worse.One of ours, a certain Mrs Efficacious Gilhhooley , is in residence in the west wing library and she only came to borrow a cup of sugar- SEVENTEEN YEARS ago!! Much worse is the way she loves to creep up Ninja style on cook and she bending into the oven to bake bread,and boot her in the hole.Poor cook is a feckin nervous wreck because of it and Mrs Gilhooley at 103 yers old really should know better.Totalfeckineejithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05352708391465031655noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8882574271400724009.post-67977939993732549472009-05-20T15:09:20.088+01:002009-05-20T15:09:20.088+01:00Has she arrived? If not, bolt the door, pretend ...Has she arrived? If not, bolt the door, pretend you are out. If she insists you are in, just whisper 'there's no one here but us mice'. Hope it works. Damn cheek!hens teethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12803941123983493090noreply@blogger.com